But for Adam no suitable helper was found. So the LORD God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and then closed up the place with flesh. Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man.
The man said, “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called ‘woman,’ for she was taken out of man.” That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.
Adam and his wife were both naked, and they felt no shame.
Genesis 2:20b-25
I think that flying an airplane would be awesome! I mean can you imagine getting behind the wheel of this little single engine plane and flying it. Being thousands of feet up in the air and being able to make that plane do loops and flips and all kinds of things. I can only imagine how awesome that must be. Flying an airplane is awesome because airplanes are so powerful. The power is what makes it awesome. Think about using a chainsaw. If you have ever used a chainsaw you know how awesome it can be to cut right through a tree. It is the power that makes it awesome. Using a handsaw to bring a tree down isn't nearly as fun. The same power that makes these things great also makes them dangerous when they aren't used the way they were intended to be used. You wouldn’t put a ten year old in an airplane, show her how to work the pedals and the steering wheel, then start the plane and walk away so she could have fun. Nor would you take a seven year old out and show him how to pull run a chainsaw then start it up and tell him to play with it. You wouldn't do that because you know that these things are awesome and powerful and amazingly fun when used the way they were created to be used. But, because they are so powerful, when they are used in ways that they were not created to be used, they can destroy lives. Sex is the same way. Sex is such an awesome and powerful gift that it needs boundaries for our safety.
The above passage of Scripture is the fountainhead of our understanding of what boundaries God has placed on sex. It doesn't seem like much at first glance, but there is quite a lot in there. First, we have to note the obvious. God made men and women and he made our bodies to work in a certain way. In other words, God created sex! And by looking at Adam and Eve we see a great picture of how God intended sex to be used. You have a husband and a wife having sex with only one another. The passage also indicates that sex works in a powerful way. It takes two people and joins them together so that they are one. This is not just a physical union. Sex bonds two people together in deeply emotional and spiritual ways. This bond is meant to last forever. Jesus says, “So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate.” (Matt 19:6). Some of you may be thinking, yeah but Adam and Eve weren’t married. Well, they didn’t go to a church and get a preacher to marry them, but they were married. You see our wedding ceremonies signify a man and woman being joined to one another by God. God was there. He gave Eve to Adam. He married them personally. So they did have a wedding, it was just different from ours.
Nowhere does the Bible teach any other model for sex outside of one man, and one woman having sex after marriage and only with each other. The Bible reports that med did different things. It reports that men married more than one woman. It tells the people of Israel what they are supposed to do when a man and woman are caught having sex when they aren’t married, but it never promotes these things. These are the boundaries that God created for sex. Within them, sex is powerful and fulfilling and enjoyable. Outside of these boundaries, sex can be devastating. (More on that next week.)
So right off the bat we can see that God is for sex. He created it. He even commands Adam and Eve to procreate (Genesis 1:28). He told them to have kids…God commanded them to have sex. Not only did He create it and command them to do it, but God created sex so that it would be pleasurable. He didn’t have to do that. God made sex fun for us! God is not against us having sex. Sex is His gift to us, but He has put boundaries on sex in order to ensure that it is used the way He created it to be used so that we do not hurt ourselves.
All of this means that you have a choice. Only you can make the choice of whether or not you are going to follow God’s plan for sex and teach your kids to do the same or if you will follow the world and have sex without boundaries. Because so many of us have sinned in this area it is important to remember that we serve a God who is in the business of putting lives back together. I John 1:9 says, “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.” God is a God of forgiveness. You can get a fresh start, but even then there are consequences for our actions.
For further reading...
- Leviticus 18- Check out the Old Testament laws regarding sex. There are some good boundaries here. It's kind of sad that God had to tell us some of this stuff.
- Leviticus 20:10-21- God places some pretty strict punishments on transgressing His boundaries for sex. We must remember that these punishments are given within the context of the old covenant. They do teach us how serious our sin is, but the specific punishments no longer apply under the new covenant. Christ has taken our punishment upon Himself.
- Matthew 19:3-9- Check out the boundaries Jesus puts on divorce. Sex really is meant to bond two people together for life.